What Not to Do During an Open Divorce Case

1 February

What Not to Do During an Open Divorce Case

So, you have hired or are looking for St Charles divorce attorneys. When going through an open divorce case, it is very important that you think carefully about your behavior and how it can help you get the results you are looking for. Making sure you take the proper precautions and avoid common mistakes can be the difference between having a smooth divorce process, and a difficult one. Making these mistakes can cause serious problems and severely hurt your case. 


When talking with St Charles divorce attorneys, your communications with them are confidential.  Sharing this information with friends, family, your spouse, or anyone else can interfere with your case. Once confidential communications with your attorney are shared with a third party, they are no longer protected from disclosure.  So while it might be tempting to discuss your attorney’s advice and responses to your spouse’s actions with your mom, your siblings, and your book club, do not do that. 

Important Documents

In a divorce, there are many important documents involved. Titles, property, insurance, etc. are all vital pieces of documented information relating to the case. Bring any questions you have regarding important documents or property to your St Charles divorce attorneys immediately. Destroying, altering, hiding, or wasting valuable documents such as these could cause you to be penalized in court. There is also a list of these types of documents which must be exchanged by the parties in all St. Charles County Family Court cases. 

Incurring Debts

Make sure to avoid unusually large debts, expenses, and liabilities throughout the duration of your case. This includes things like luxury clothes, vacations, or other luxury items. Incurring these debts may be considered irresponsible by the judge and hurt your case. When the judge splits property, debts, and liabilities, you may be forced to take full responsibility for those unusual debts you incurred during the case.  Some counties have an immediate order to protect property, which mean you could be sanctioned if you take on debt outside of your usual spending or sell property without your spouse’s consent.

Speaking with your Spouse

The St. Charles Divorce attorneys at Flesner Wentzel will tell you that communication with your spouse during an open divorce case is all about controlling your own behavior.   Divorce is an emotional time.  The other side may react emotionally and make statements to you that the Court will hold against them.  You cannot control that.  What you can control is how you speak to your spouse.  If your communication is respectful in tone and provides relevant information about any children involved or settlement, the Court will not have anything to hold against you and will care more about the ways that your spouse’s communication is inappropriate.

At Flesner Wentzel, we usually suggest communicating with your spouse in writing to make a record of what was said and to prevent misunderstandings. You can do that by text, email, or a parenting communication app.  Keep in mind that written communication can be misunderstood because there is no tone to help understand the other parties’ meaning.  If your message seems unclear or could be taken two ways, rewrite it so that you can be sure you are getting your point across in a calm way.  

Communicating with your soon to be ex is something that you will have to do for years to come in most situations, particularly where you have kids.  Starting that communication off on the wrong foot is a bad idea, not only because it can affect the outcome of your case but because it can damage your co-parenting relationship for the future.  

Talking About your Spouse to Others

In divorce court, belittling or talking ill of your spouse to a third party is a very frowned upon offense. There are a lot of emotional moments during this process, but as most St Charles attorneys will tell you, negative outbursts regarding your spouse to will hurt your case. Many of these third parties you are speaking to may end up having to testify before the court under oath, and all of those angry comments against your spouse will do nothing but hurt your case. 

Not only is it important to keep outbursts to third parties to a minimum but to children as well. Never under any circumstances belittle your spouse in front of the children. Child psychologists have proven time and again that this will cause children to have serious self-image issues, and will actually backfire on you as the criticizing parent. More often than not, if it is found that you made comments such as these to the children, you will be at risk of immediately losing the case entirely. 

Entering Contracts and Starting Businesses

Until the day after your divorce, any contracts that you sign, property you obtain, or businesses you start, become marital property and are eligible to be divided. Even if these are not divided by the time the divorce is complete, your spouse will be given interest in your business or property, because it was acquired while the marriage was still ongoing. The court can even mandate that you sell your property or business so that your spouse can have a share of it. Therefore, consult your St Charles attorneys, before entering into any contract, starting a business, or acquiring any asset.

Find a St Charles Divorce Attorney Today!

Looking for St Charles Attorneys? Contact the legal experts at Flesner Wentzel or find us on Facebook to get the legal help you need. We will work with you to ensure you are making the best possible decisions to succeed in your case. If you need a lawyer or simply have questions, don’t hesitate to reach out!


The information you obtain at this site is not, nor is it intended to be, legal advice. You should consult an attorney for advice regarding your individual situation. Each legal matter is different.  Past results are not an indication of future results.  

We invite you to contact us and welcome your calls, letters, and electronic mail. Contacting us does not create an attorney-client relationship. Please do not send any confidential information to us until such time as an attorney-client relationship has been established.  Additionally, time-sensitive or confidential information should not be sent through this website. 

The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely upon advertisements. 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *